Friday, November 5, 2010

I am the mother...

Inspired by Fiona2107.wordpress.com

I am the mother who lets my son eat fudge rounds, donuts or a smoothie for breakfast, just so I know he ate something before school and preventing an argument by trying to get him to eat something more nutritious.

I am the mother who doesn't care if he wears sweatpants, elastic pants or shorts all year round because the pockets on jeans hurt him and sends him into histarics.

I am the mother who doesn't care if he still wants training wheels on his bike at 8 years old.

I am the mother who will let him spend hours on the computer watching youtube videos with Mario, Sonic or Thomas the Train because it calms his mind and his body.

I am the mother that worries about her little girl having the same issues one day.

I am the mother who will be at the school demanding to see the principal and won't take no for an answer.

I am the mother who will seek out a childs parents if they keep telling my son "I will be your friend if..." and then my child get hurt in the end by letting someone "borrow" his toys, eat his lunch, get his tooth knocked out from a ball being thrown at him, etc., etc.

I am the mother who feels guilty that I have to work and can't take my child to school everyday and pick him up.

I am the mother who has an incredible, loving man, but wonders deep down if he will ever truly understand the problems Blake faces and has and if it will pose a threat to our relationship going to the next level.

I am the mother who lives off of caffeine.

I am the mother who tries to take control over things that I truly have no control over.

I am the mother who bought the boy a $20 star wars lego watch because the normal driver of him to school was sick and he had to ride the bus (which he hates because of bullies).

I am the mother who is so stressed that I have no clue which way to turn next and will forget anything that is not in the calendar or blackberry.

I am the mother who has spent many lonely, sleepless nights crying just to think about what my child has to endure everyday and what the future holds for him.

I am the mother who's heart breaks when her child says "I am a bad boy, I am a bad brother."

I am the mother who gets mad at herself and cries because I took, "Oh, he'll grow out of it," or "It's just a stage" when I knew deep down something else was different and wrong and now we missed out on early therapy and interventions that could have been helping him years ago.

BUT...

I am the mother of 2 very awesome, caring kids.

I am the mother who will live without so they can have.

I am the mother who wishes she could be more resilient like her son and let people's words and actions just bounce off and not be worried about again.

I am the mother who wishes people truly understood my child and could be more compassionate to him.

I am the mother who vows to spend every last breath I have researching for help and a cure for Aspergers and SPD and to end bullying, especially in schools.

I am the mother who thinks a smile and a hug from my children are worth a million bucks.

I am the mother who cries when my child tells me his feelings instead of acting out, because this is a small breakthrough.

I am the mother who fought with her sister when they were younger, but would give ANYTHING to have her not living 800 miles away now. The one person I can TRULY say loves the kids and doesn't judge my parenting skills. My best friend.

I am the mother who doesn't quit.

I am the mother who loves to sit with him and look at his scrapbook over and over and over again to remind him what a special boy he has always been and always will be to his mommy.

I am the mother who loves to hear them laugh. It means more to me than money could ever buy. Money doesn't buy happiness, but sometimes time does.

I AM THAT MOTHER!

5 comments:

  1. Just beautiful Lisa. You are the BEST mom for Blake and he's very blessed to have someone who loves him so much/
    Sending hugs from down under :)
    x
    PS. LOVE your new theme !

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  2. thank you Fiona for inspiring us all to take a step back and look at ourselves like this.

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  3. Such a beautiful post Lisa! I am now following you thanks to Follow Me Back Tuesday and it would be so nice if you could share the love back on my blog:)
    And don't forget to stop by today because we continue with our Show Yo' Flow Campaign, and you don't want to miss the interview we have on Stefanie and the amazing surprises she has for our readers:) See you there! Happy Tuesday!

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  4. I am a new follower please follow me back.
    Nancy
    www.findingblessingsineverydaylife.blogspot.com
    I love that post!

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  5. WOW!!!!If I didn't know any better I would think this is me. I have a 13 year old son with Aspergers. It's a hard road, but so much harder before we knew what was going on. At least now we know and we can deal with what lies ahead.

    Fellow Blog Hopper:)

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